If you are separating and living or working in London, you have probably been told to try mediation before anything else. That advice is sound, but it rarely comes with an explanation of what actually happens. This guide walks through family mediation in London step by step, so you know what to expect before you book anything.
Whether you are sorting out arrangements for your children, dividing money and property, or both, the process follows the same basic shape. It is usually quicker and considerably less expensive than going to court, and for most separating couples in London it is now the expected first step.
What is family mediation and how does it work?
Family mediation is a series of structured meetings between you, your former partner and a trained, impartial mediator. The mediator does not take sides and does not make decisions for you. Their job is to help the two of you talk through the practical issues, children, finances, the family home, and reach an agreement you can both live with.
It is voluntary, confidential and a great deal more flexible than court. Sessions can be held in person at offices across London or online, which matters when one of you has moved out of the city or you are juggling work in central London with childcare elsewhere. Many separating couples find that mediation lets them stay in control of decisions about their own family, rather than handing those decisions to a judge who has never met them. In practice, family mediation in London runs no differently from the rest of England and Wales, the differences are local ones: venues, courts and the cost of housing.
Since April 2024, the Family Procedure Rules have also put more weight behind non-court dispute resolution. London family courts now expect separating couples to have genuinely considered mediation before issuing an application, and judges can pause proceedings to allow it.
Step 1: The MIAM, your first meeting
The family mediation process starts with a MIAM, which stands for Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting. This is a one-to-one meeting between you and a mediator, usually lasting about 45 minutes to an hour. Your former partner attends their own MIAM separately.
At the MIAM, the mediator explains how mediation works, checks whether it is suitable for your situation, and answers your questions. It is also a legal checkpoint. If you later want to apply to court about children or finances, you will normally need to show you have attended a MIAM first. In London, that applies whether your case would be heard at the Central Family Court in High Holborn or one of the other London hearing centres.
You can read more about what a MIAM involves and where to attend one in London, or see London Mediation Service’s own MIAM London guide for booking details.
Step 2: Joint mediation sessions
If both of you are willing and the mediator agrees it is suitable, you move on to joint sessions. Most couples need between two and five sessions, each lasting around 90 minutes. The number depends on how many issues you need to resolve and how far apart you are at the start.
In a typical first joint session, the mediator helps you agree an agenda. Child arrangements come first, then finances. For money matters, you will each complete financial disclosure, which simply means setting out what you own, owe and earn so decisions are made on accurate information. In London, where the family home is the largest asset by a wide margin, this stage deserves care.
If sitting in the same room feels impossible, ask about shuttle mediation, where you sit in separate rooms and the mediator moves between you, or online sessions with separate video links. Mediation for divorcing couples does not require you to be on good terms, only willing to try.
Step 3: Reaching agreement and making it binding
When you reach agreement, the mediator writes it up. For children, this is usually a Parenting Plan. For finances, it is a Memorandum of Understanding alongside an Open Financial Statement.
These documents are not legally binding on their own, and that is deliberate. It gives you both the chance to take legal advice before committing. If you want the financial agreement made binding, a solicitor can turn the Memorandum of Understanding into a consent order for the court to approve. This is usually a paperwork exercise, with no hearing needed, and it is far cheaper than asking a court to decide the finances for you. If you are weighing up whether mediation or court is right for you, it helps to remember that anything agreed in mediation can still be made legally binding, so you rarely give anything up by trying it first.
How long does it take and what does it cost in London?
Most family mediation in London concludes within six to twelve weeks of the first MIAM, depending on diaries and how complex the finances are. Compare that with contested court proceedings, which routinely take a year or more in the London family courts.
Costs vary between services, but as a rough guide expect a MIAM to cost around *£150 to £180 per person, and joint sessions from about *£150 to £200 per person per hour. Even a longer mediation typically costs each of you a small fraction of a contested court case, where legal fees in London can run well into five figures.
Two schemes can reduce the bill. The government’s Family Mediation Voucher Scheme contributes up to £500 towards mediation involving children. And if you are on a low income, you may qualify for legal aid, which can cover your MIAM and sessions in full, and pays for the other person’s MIAM and first session too.
*Please note costs are estimates
Editor’s Note, 2026
This article is part of an archive preserved from the original Law Firm London website. Law Firm London has joined London Mediation Service and no longer takes on new instructions under this name.
For up-to-date family mediation and divorce help in London, please visit London Mediation Service.
Finding family mediation in London near you
If you have been searching for family mediation near me from a London postcode, the practical question is where you can actually attend. London Mediation Service provides family mediation in London from offices in Central London near Waterloo, North London by St Pancras and South London at Sutton, alongside online sessions for anyone who prefers them.
Location matters more than people expect. Sessions happen during working hours, so a venue close to a mainline station or your workplace makes the whole process easier to sustain. You can find details of the Central London office near Waterloo and the South London office in Sutton on the London Mediation Service site.
Frequently asked questions
Do I have to be in the same room as my ex?
No. Shuttle mediation keeps you in separate rooms, and online mediation can use separate video links. Tell the mediator at your MIAM if this is a concern.
Is family mediation in London compulsory before court?
Mediation itself is voluntary, but attending a MIAM is normally required before applying to a family court about children or finances, unless an exemption applies, for example where there has been domestic abuse.
What if we cannot agree on everything?
Partial agreement still helps. Anything you settle in mediation narrows what a court would need to decide, which saves time and money even if some issues remain.
Is what I say in mediation confidential?
Yes, discussions are legally privileged and cannot generally be referred to in court. Financial disclosure is the exception, as it is open information either way.
A sensible first step
Family mediation in London is not a soft option and it is not right for every couple, but for most separating families it is the quickest and least expensive way to reach workable arrangements. The process is straightforward: a MIAM each, a handful of joint sessions, then a written agreement you can make legally binding if you choose.
The single most useful thing you can do next is book a MIAM. It commits you to nothing beyond one conversation, and it will tell you within the hour whether mediation can work for your situation.
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